Akiosexual

Key Features

• Akiosexual refers to individuals who experience sexual attraction, but this attraction fades or dissipates when it is reciprocated by the other person.

• It is an orientation where the desire to act on attraction is often dependent on whether the attraction is mutual or not, with many akiosexual individuals not desiring reciprocation at all.

• Akiosexuality highlights how attraction can exist without a corresponding desire for engagement, challenging traditional notions of sexual involvement.

• Individuals who identify as akiosexual may face challenges like misunderstanding, lack of representation, and confusion with other orientations but can find validation through education and inclusive support.

Context

Sexual Attraction That Fades Upon Reciprocation

Akiosexual individuals typically experience sexual attraction toward someone, but lose interest once those feelings are returned or acknowledged by the other person. The attraction fades or dissipates when the possibility of mutual involvement becomes real.

Example: An akiosexual person may find themselves attracted to someone, but if that person shows interest, the initial sexual attraction they felt can fade away, leaving them with no desire to pursue it further.

Indifference to Reciprocation

Some akiosexual individuals may not have the desire for their feelings to be reciprocated at all. They may experience sexual attraction but have no interest in seeking out mutual engagement or involvement with the person they are attracted to. This indifference means they are not motivated by the possibility of a relationship or engagement, even if they are attracted to someone.

Example: A person who identifies as akiosexual may enjoy the feeling of sexual attraction but is content without needing or wanting the person they are attracted to to return those feelings.

Focus on Attraction Rather Than Engagement

Akiosexuality centers on the feeling of attraction itself rather than the desire for a mutual connection or physical intimacy. People who identify as akiosexual may enjoy the sensation of attraction, but once the dynamics shift to reciprocation, they lose interest in pursuing a sexual connection.

Akiosexual vs. Related Identities

• Lithsexual: Often used interchangeably with akiosexual, lithsexual refers to someone who feels sexual attraction that fades when reciprocated. This is a key part of akiosexuality.

• Allosexual: Allosexual people are those who experience sexual attraction and are generally interested in acting on that attraction with reciprocation from others. In contrast, akiosexual individuals often lose interest once attraction is reciprocated.

• Asexual: Asexual individuals experience little to no sexual attraction, which is different from akiosexual individuals, who do experience attraction but don’t want it to be reciprocated.

• Reciprosexual: A reciprocal sexual attraction orientation where someone only feels attracted to others who are attracted to them first, the opposite of akiosexual where attraction fades once reciprocated.

Example: A lithsexual person might experience sexual attraction toward someone but lose interest when the person shows any sign of reciprocating. An akiosexual person might feel a similar initial attraction but may also not care whether the attraction is returned or not.

Cultural Relevance

Challenging Norms of Mutual Sexual Desire

Akiosexuality challenges the conventional assumption that sexual attraction naturally leads to mutual desire and engagement. In most cultural narratives, mutual attraction and reciprocation are central to the development of sexual and romantic relationships. Akiosexuality, however, highlights a distinct experience where the reciprocity of attraction is not desired or is a turn-off. This challenges heteronormative and allonormative views that sexual attraction always results in mutual pursuit or interaction.

Example: Akiosexual individuals demonstrate that sexual attraction doesn’t always lead to or require mutuality, providing alternative perspectives on how sexual desire can be experienced.

Validating Diverse Sexual Experiences

Akiosexuality introduces another layer of complexity to understanding sexual attraction and desire. It shows that sexual attraction does not always result in a need for reciprocation, offering validity to experiences that are often misunderstood or overlooked. Acknowledging orientations like akiosexual helps create a broader and more inclusive understanding of human sexuality, where desires and experiences vary widely between individuals.

Example: An akiosexual person may feel sexual attraction to someone, but they may not want to act on it or engage with the person once they know the feeling is mutual, which is a valid and unique experience.

Reworking the Concept of Sexual Motivation

Akiosexuality emphasizes that attraction does not always drive the need for physical intimacy or relationship formation. This can challenge ideas of sexual engagement being tied directly to relationship building, demonstrating that attraction can exist independently of the desire for a deeper connection. By recognizing akiosexuality, we can better appreciate the variety of motivations behind sexual attraction, from desire for intimacy to simple interest in the feeling of attraction without the need to act on it.

Example: An akiosexual individual might enjoy the experience of attraction but has no interest in pursuing it further with the person they are attracted to. This shows that sexual feelings don’t always lead to physical actions or relationship development.

Challenges Faced by Akiosexual Individuals

• Misunderstanding and Erasure: Akiosexuality may be misunderstood or dismissed by those who assume that sexual attraction must naturally lead to mutual involvement. The identity might be confused with a lack of interest in sex altogether, similar to asexuality, or assumed to be just a “phase” rather than a valid orientation.

• Lack of Representation: Akiosexual individuals are often not represented in media, which can lead to feelings of isolation or lack of validation for their experiences. Sexual identities that deviate from traditional expectations (e.g., mutual attraction leading to relationships) are still largely underrepresented in popular culture.

• Confusion With Other Orientations: The concept of attraction fading upon reciprocation might be difficult for others to understand, leading to confusion with other orientations such as asexuality or lithsexuality. Those unfamiliar with these identities might mistake akiosexuality for a general disinterest in relationships or sexual experiences.